Many couples worry about finding LGBT-friendly vendors as
they plan their wedding. Nothing sucks the excitement and romance out of
organizing your big day like walking into a caterer’s for a tasting and
realizing that they did not expect a same-sex couple.
I have heard it both ways, some couples say that a vendor or
venue never used assumed pronouns until they met the couple, other people have
had to fill out contracts labeling one person the “bride” and the other the
“groom.” All-in-all, I think the best thing anyone has said to me is this, “We
decided to let our money do the talking.” As you should. This is probably the
biggest chunk of change you’ll ever spend on one day and it should be the best
day ever. If a vendor doesn’t expect a same-sex couple, but quickly adjusts and
takes it in stride, I can deal with that, especially if their contract is
gender-neutral. But if you, for any reason, feel uncomfortable, take your business elsewhere!
Some states are luckier with this than others (you know who
you are!). If you are looking for LGBT-friendly vendors, one great place to turn
is our very own Crème de la Crème vendor list. It is full of vendors who not
only want to work with same sex couples, but who have experience with them,
which is key.
If you don’t have luck there, and you have an idea of which
vendors you’d like to work with in your area, book appointments! Here are a few
things you should never be afraid to ask…
1. Have you worked with same sex couples before? (A florist’s
answer might not matter so much, but a photographer’s will, you want to make
sure that the person capturing your wedding day understands the dynamic of your
relationship and never makes you feel uncomfortable.)
2. Can we use a gender-neutral contract? (It is 2014,
3. Can we see samples of your work? (Whenever you hire a
vendor, for a wedding or other event, you should always see samples of their
work to make sure it’s what you are in the market for.)
Keeping all of this in mind, I hope you are better prepared
for the task of finding vendors to make your wedding day perfect!