H&H Weddings

etiquette / article Jul 13 2016

Kids Free Wedding


Kids can be a great addition to weddings; they are adorable when they dance, they make almost every picture better and they are the perfect ring bearers and flower tossers. However, not everyone wants tots to attend their marital ceremony. We’re here to help you make it clear to your friends and family that you are excited to spend the day with them, but not their rug rats.

Children tend to be a touchy subject, so in a situation like this, we suggest being overly polite about things.  

First and foremost, this is your day and if you don’t want kids there, that’s your prerogative. Don’t let anyone make you feel bad about that decision. Besides, depending on the location and setting of your wedding and reception, children might not be appropriate guests.  

If you are inviting many people who have children, the best first step is to make the invitations straight forward and firm. Stating, “You and one guest are invited,” or, “We love your munchkins, but this is a grownup shindig,” makes the message clear; this won’t be romper room.  

If the invitation isn’t explicit enough and you get the sense that a guest may be planning on bringing their children, it’s best to face the problem head-on. You or your partner (whoever is closer to the guest) should call to cordially uninvite the little ones. Chalking it up to a misunderstanding keeps things copasetic. Another option is to make it about the kids and parents. “ I just don’t think they’d have a good time,” or, “We want to spend quality time with you, without the distraction of children.” Both of these convey the message you are trying to get across.  

Ultimately, if the guest is not getting what you'€™re trying to say, you may just have to be blunt. It's the least favorable option, but you reserve the right to have your wedding the way you want it and no one should get in the way of that.

Tagged: etiquette, engagements
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