Many couples worry about finding LGBT-friendly vendors as they plan their wedding. Nothing sucks the excitement and romance out of organizing your big day like walking into a caterer’s for a tasting and realizing that they did not expect a same-sex couple.
I have heard it both ways, some couples say that a vendor or venue never used assumed pronouns until they met the couple, other people have had to fill out contracts labeling one person the “bride” and the other the “groom.” All-in-all, I think the best thing anyone has said to me is this, “We decided to let our money do the talking.” As you should. This is probably the biggest chunk of change you’ll ever spend on one day and it should be the best day ever. If a vendor doesn’t expect a same-sex couple, but quickly adjusts and takes it in stride, I can deal with that, especially if their contract is gender-neutral. But if you, for any reason, feel uncomfortable, take your business elsewhere!
Some states are luckier with this than others (you know who you are!). If you are looking for LGBT-friendly vendors, one great place to turn is our very own Crème de la Crème vendor list. It is full of vendors who not only want to work with same sex couples, but who have experience with them, which is key.
If you don’t have luck there, and you have an idea of which vendors you’d like to work with in your area, book appointments! Here are a few things you should never be afraid to ask…
1. Have you worked with same sex couples before? (A florist’s answer might not matter so much, but a photographer’s will, you want to make sure that the person capturing your wedding day understands the dynamic of your relationship and never makes you feel uncomfortable.)
2. Can we use a gender-neutral contract? (It is 2014, after all!)
3. Can we see samples of your work? (Whenever you hire a vendor, for a wedding or other event, you should always see samples of their work to make sure it’s what you are in the market for.)
Keeping all of this in mind, I hope you are better prepared for the task of finding vendors to make your wedding day perfect!