Love & Sex
The Case For Boudoir
National Nude Day just passed and it got me thinking. I am a naked person. I always have been. The bane of my existence is pants. And, also, bras. But, what I have realized over the years is that not everyone is so comfortable being naked. I do not have a perfect body and neither do you, but that’s ok and that’s how it’s supposed to be. Imperfection should not hinder confidence, though, and that’s what’s been so troubling to me lately. The more I chat with friends and the more I get to know people, I realize that many folks are so damn uncomfortable in their own skin and it really frustrates me. I’m not saying that everyone needs to work in their undies like I do, I’m just saying that, when push comes to shove, we should all feel ok about our birthday suits because it’s the body you have to live in and fuck the society that deems us unworthy of happiness in our own skin.
When boudoir photography first started making it into my periphery, I immediately thought of Samantha on Sex and the City. You know that episode where she has some sexy photos taken "for herself," then sort of seeks approval from the framer and the guy who delivers the framed photo of her nude? That one. I was worried that the people doing boudoir would be doing it for other people. And, don’t get me wrong, that’s a super sexy gift to give someone, but my hope was that, ultimately, the people in these stripped down photos would gain an amount of assurance that they were beautiful and worthy and sexy. And then in walks a group of photographers who love the human form and understand that boudoir isn’t about anyone other than the person being photographed.
What I love about the emerging boudoir trend is that it completely removes the mysogyny. It is truly about the subject (whatever their gender identity) and their uniqueness. Have you checked out the work on Christina Karst? I mean, come. on. It’s beyond stunning. She takes the curves and slopes and shadows and shapes of each individual’s body and turns it into breath-taking art. (btw - this is totally not sponsored, I’m just obsessed.) She is an advocate of #freethenipple and of people (all types of people) feeling their absolute best with minimal attire. It’s amazing to see the work she does. Also, couples boudoir is stunning and a great way for a couple to connect with each other.
Confidence with our naked bodies really translates to confidence elsewhere and confidence means comfort and that, right there, makes everything better – work, love, sex, etc.
As far as relationships and sex goes, empowerment is essential and sex positivity isn’t something that many people talk about. For your partner(s) and for yourself, it is SO important to have the ability to say what your feel and talk about what you want. I think, often, in the vulnerable state of nudity, people feel too self-conscious to talk about desires and so much goes unsaid. And this is why boudoir is helpful – it can showcase the beauty of a person’s naked form so that they can feel better about being naked. It’s a whole, full circle thing happening here.
Boudoir is about getting in touch with yourself. What makes you feel sexy? What makes you feel powerful? Those are the questions that a boudoir photographer will help you answer. Taking the time to focus on yourself is incredibly empowering and we encourage everyone to try a boudoir session.